Introduction
The effect of domestic violence
on children has negative effect on the well-being and development of a child.
Recently, I came across a child
who is almost 2 years old. He barely crawls nor allows anyone to carry him.
Even his mum only backs him. She drops him only when he is to be breastfed. He
is physically looking healthier than lots of his peer health wise, he has been
examined, and confirmed to be very healthy. Yes it may seem normal or might
have been seen in various cases that a child might last longer than usual
before he/she begins to work. After some questionings, and researches it was
confirmed that he is scared of people precisely males. This is because his
parents usually fight and he has seen violence in his parents and believed it
is something everyone transfers or bares.
During my research, I read about
a girl that was hospitalized due to a severe accident she sustained while
running down the stair case to call the neighbours ton separate her ever
fighting parents. Statistically, 1 of 4 children is exposed to domestic
violence. At least 50% of women that are victims of domestic violence have
children that see the acts of their parents. Although a man abusing a woman is
recognized more often, abusers may be male or female. Abuse can happen in any
class, religion, ethnic group, occupation or age. It is important to note that
children exposed to domestic violence are more at risk for other forms of
maltreatment such as physical abuse and neglect.
Children exposed to domestic
violence at infancy often experience an inability to bond and form secure
attachments, often resulting in intensified startled reactions and an inhibited
sense of exploration and play. Statistics show that a child who witnesses
violence between their parents or guardians is more likely to carry on violent
behaviours in their own adult lives. “Even when child witnesses do not suffer
physical injury, the emotional consequences of viewing or hearing violent acts
are severe and long-lasting. When a child witness’s violence, he cries, loss of
appetite , falls sick, low self-esteem, a bully or victim of bullying, low
performance, have sleeping problems and slow growth.
What is domestic violence?
Domestic violence also called
domestic abuse or intimate partner violence is a manner of behaviour in
relationship that is an unhealthy way of gaining power or chance forcefully
over the other partner. This abuse or violence may be in different forms such
as Physical, Mental/Emotional, Sexual and Financial/economic violence.
Physical Violence; is termed physical because it involves the use
of objects in harming the partner or by exchanging blows, and in most cases
harming themselves physically. In most cases, physical violence comes up by
using one of the other types of Violence as excuse. For instance; a fight
resulting from refusal to give out money by one party may result in physical
fight. Children who are victims of domestic violence are often frequently ill,
and may suffer from poor hygiene. Children who witness domestic violence also
have a tendency to partake in high risk play activities, self-abuse, and
suicide
Mental/Emotional Violence; is a case whereby the both partners have
used words or actions indirectly to hurt themselves. This could be from one
partner being insincere with the other or being cheated.
Sexual Violence; is a sexual attack, or an attempt made on someone,
sexually, with force or without proper consent of the person.
Financial violence; It has been observed that 995 of domestic
Violence cases has financial violence in it. This is a tactical way of keeping
a victim of violence mute and still suffering in the relationship. When he or
she has no means to speak or go out of the relation due to financial constraints
and limitation, a stay becomes the only option.
Other forms of domestic Violence
include cultural violence where a victim is forced to follow a particular
culture irrespective of the victim actual culture.
Generally, all the forms of
violence are a means of intimidating, and instilling fear in a victims mind.
Characteristics of Domestic Violence
Every child suffering from
domestic violence has certain characteristics they exhibit that differentiate
them from children from a happy home. Some of these are;
Physical characteristics: a child suffering from domestic violence
may be seen with certain deformity which might have been a result of the
previous violence. He/ she may have been involved directly or in directly. Some
of these deformities in the child’s physical appearance may have resulted from
a pull or push the mother as a victim might have experienced during one of the
cases while she was still pregnant. In some cases it even leads to pre-matured
births which of course is already a temper with the child supposed normal life.
Social Characteristics; a child who grew up in violence will see it
as norms being aggressive or being a bully or unfriendly. In some cases he/she
might not be that any, but might find it difficult to mingle properly amidst
people, since he has already had the mind set of violence. Even if he doesn’t
show it, it finds a way out.
Mental/Emotional Characteristics; It shouldn’t be expected that a
child that has suffered such will have much of human feelings. Yes they grow up
at times with the pity seeing the pains either of the parents go through from
the home violence. But then, the mental stability of children generally gets
reshaped due to this. Depression and anger is common in children experiencing
domestic violence.
Performance Characteristic; from smartness at home down to academic
and the likes, such children find it difficult to cope within themselves and
peer group. In most cases, they end up being dubiously smart.
Safety of children from domestic violence
Being aware of the fact that
domestic violence has a long negative effect on children, all possible safety
measures should be put in place To ensure children are protected from
witnessing domestic violence. Though its not certain that exposure to domestic
violence is merely a matter of witnessing it. It may be an accidental
occurrence or a concurrent one with purpose of it being witnessed.
Children and young people need to
grow up in a secure and nurturing environment. Where domestic or family
violence exists, the home is not safe or secure and children are scared about
what might happen to them and the people they love. Hence, the most important
measure is making safety of the child/children a priority and making sure the
children are out of the abusive environment. Also, children should be taught a
more well-mannered behaviour on how to resolve disputes and not by violence. In
cases where a child becomes a victim of domestic violence either accidentally
or directly, a measure of guidance and counselling can also be put in place to
re-stabilize the slightly or highly disrupted mental sanity of the child. Every
child’s well-being is a priority to the parent.
Domestic Violence has an effect
that lingers long on the victims directly or indirectly. It should therefore be
avoided as best as possible.
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